It all started on the morning of the 2nd June 1989, when I was released into the world that is known as… London. Well, if we want to get into technical terms, it started 9 months before that (give or take), but that’s another story that I’d rather not think about.
The Beginning of time - as I knew it
So… you may think that the birth was a success and this post will now end, but in fact, I’ll have you know… it wasn’t. Now you must read on to fulfill your curiosity…
To start off the complications, I was a fat baby. I’m rather skinny at the moment after “heavy dieting regimes”, but back then, I was a week late and… couldn’t fit through the “door”. So, alternatives measures had to be put in place. A man in a white coat called “Doctor” took a knife to the wall and imitated what he hoped he did at the breakdown of the Berlin wall that very year. He eventually got through and I saw light. It burnt… especially after being confined in the dark for 9 months… light was not my friend. But I was strong! I did not cry! Never! Instead… I hiccoughed. This was my entry into the world… hiccoughs. Doctor didn’t like this and thought there was something wrong… very wrong. Did Doctor do something when he broke down the wall? Well, luckily for him, a lawsuit wasn’t on his way as 1. This isn’t America, and 2. He didn’t cause it. After extreme examination, he found a problem with the heart. Oh dear… It was a hole in my heart! After 6 weeks of waiting, someone at another hospital managed to sew the hole shut, and finally I was free! Free from the white lights that surrounded me for 6 weeks, and now managed to see other colours, like the blue layer of air that lay above me. Free at last…
Well… that was a rather adventurous first set of days in London as a 0 year old, but hopefully with future posts, things will begin to calm down. Why not, whilst you wait for the next post, try and see if YOU can save my life by carrying out the same operation as Doctor did?
