I’m Old.
Start of a new year. 2012. Sitting in my apartment located in the middle of nowhere. Well, the middle of Japan but it feels like nowhere. I had a really good start to the new year. It started about 8pm on the final day of last year, in an izakaya. Karaoke followed which then led us to a shrine for midnight. A very relaxed and slightly tipsy start. I threw in a coin and made a wish.
Another year has passed me by. I know I have achieved well in 2011, but perhaps not much. I finally made it to Japan and am working. I have a nice apartment and made it to a six-figure salary (though ideally this would be in pounds and doesn’t quite translate).
I know I’m not old. I’m only 22. I feel old though, as if I should be further in life right now. A bizarre feeling when I put everything into perspective. I’m not entirely sure whether to slow down or speed up. I feel it should be the latter.
I think I need to be busier. I miss it. Sounds rather strange but it is quite difficult to be busy when you have time. OK, that sounds obvious but the motivation is lacking. Various different projects and studying Japanese should be occurring now as it is the ample time for this to take shape. What has actually become of me? A sluggish, tired and time-wasting personality has taken over and though I try to think of a way out, the exit is hard to find.
Maybe the answer is to leave the countryside. I am a city boy and always have been. Thank goodness University societies and other activities kept me busy otherwise I would have been in the same boat as I am in today. York was the most country-esque place I have ever lived in. Until I came here of course. I love change, but this is hard. A concrete jungle to acres of rice fields is not an easy transition.
Perhaps I miss company. People my age in this neighbourhood are hard to come by. Especially when I am still at an age of a University student here. I miss University. Busy and fun. Everyone around here thinks I am much older, at least 26… even pushing 30. Maybe this adds to the ageing feeling.
When I came here, I may have become relaxed on a New Year’s Resolution I made back a few years ago and have kept so truthfully. I have made and kept many but this one particular resolution is one I am sure everyone makes but struggles to keep. I am fortunate to have kept it but unfortunate to have lost it. It is to take everyday as it comes, try to achieve something whether it is something big or small every single day.
I am going to try and use Twitter this year to once again, make this come true. If you want to see if it is working, have a look at @robertkodama
Robert Kodama, 
Skip, and 
JD Japan 9:37 am on January 1, 2012 Permalink |
Sounds like what I’d like to achieve by the time I hit 22, if not more. I’ve always wanted to live in the country but the fear of being lonely is always lingering in my mind. Keep it up
-Jeff
Robert Kodama 12:12 pm on January 1, 2012 Permalink |
Nice blog! I think once you’ve finished University, you should definitely try at least for one year. Instead of just wanting to do something, just do it!
Or a nice holiday for a taste – though I must say that a holiday will give you only just that.
Skip 7:03 am on January 6, 2012 Permalink |
Akemashite omedetou gozaimasu. (How many times have you said this since midnight on December 31st? )
I suddenly feel far too old to even be commenting on anything you post, Kodama-kun. Your life is just starting (and I have to say I thought you were much older than 22). Mine is mostly spent. I am in Tokyo now but have been at my place in Miwamura near you since December 28th, so I know what you mean about there not being many young people around Hitachiomiya. Everyone in Miwamura seems ancient to me, and I am ancient myself, although in Tokyo my friends are often much younger than me. The good news for you is that most Japanese tend to socialize with their peers and those of the same age. It sounds like you may just need to try harder to expand your circle of younger friends there. The fct you are not Japanese must be an added attraction for the people you meet there; don’t they find you sort of….exotic? I am an old fart, and everyone is uniformly decent and gracious to me there.
BTW, there is a university in Mito. You might want to volunteer to act as a judge or something for their English Language Club – where you can surely expand your circle of friends, and maybe find some other activities you’ll enjoy. (Good place to meet girls, too, I think.)
I am heading back to Miwa tonight after work (I found the fastest way is to take the bullet train to Utsunomiya from Tokyo station, then transfer to Karasuyama, which is closer to my place than Hitachiomiya). Be there until Monday p.m. My cell is 080 4650-3745 – if you get bored to tears give me a call, although I understand perfectly if you don’t feel like it. (age.) Anyway, best wishes for a great new year in Ibaraki. And many new friends you will enjoy making.
Robert Kodama 3:49 am on January 7, 2012 Permalink |
Cheers mate
are you no longer saying in miwa then?
Yes it has been tough. I do want a circle my own age too though. I have tried the university and had moderate success… I think I just need to go back to a city life. London to Hitachiomiya is a sudden change and I’m just not cut out for country life. It’s kind of making me bonkers. Going to Tokyo is like therapy. Ahh but at least it’s been sunny every day!
Skip 5:54 am on January 14, 2012 Permalink
Good to meet you in person and hear about la vie Hitachiomiya from an old timer. Thanks for your time, Robert.
My Canadian friend Allison, who prefers cities like you, wasn’t so taken with my part of Ibaraki during his brief visit so he enjoyed getting to gab with you. Hope he wasn’t too much.
Is here an email address where I can reach you without getting it posted here, by the way? I feel my contributions are not appropriate nor interesting enough for public consumption as a rule. lol
I am in Tokyo this weekend but will be back next weekend and would like to meet your friend who teaches in Miwa if you happen to have time and feel like coming around for a visit that would work too, I think.. I was kind of pleased when I asked around about your American teacher friend and no one knew of him, which I take as a good sign there are other sources for local gossip, which makes life easier for everyone around there. I prefer a healthy veneer of privacy – even around my admittedly somewhat uneventful life.
Robert Kodama 5:57 am on January 14, 2012 Permalink
Not at all! It was nice meeting you both too. I will text you an address too.
Saturday afternoon would be best, does this suit you?